Embrace what you find

18 weeks, 6 days.

We've postponed our regular check-up appointment.  It was supposed to be tomorrow, but I've pushed it out a week, so that it will take place after our big anatomy scan ultrasound on Thursday.  That way, my OB can tell us whatever they learn from our ultrasound in person, rather than on the phone.

So, we wait.

And I'm in pain.  I've been in a mild amount of pain since about 14 weeks, but I didn't think much of it.  I think it's because, in the past (pre-pregnancy), when I've felt pain, it would just eventually go away.  In this case, unfortunately, it just got worse.  And maybe worse than that - now, I can't take my painkiller of choice (Ibuprofen).

Pain is what brought me to the OB's office this past Friday.  Unfortunately, they didn't diagnose me with anything other than 'normal' pregnancy pain.  From what I read online, though, it's not terribly normal to live with this pain.  So, after we determine that all is well from the ultrasound (fingers crossed!), I'll call a physical therapist and see if I can get a good pain management routine going.

I'm fixated on my weight, too.  Specifically, the fact that I haven't gained any yet.  Jesse and I can both tell that I'm "showing," but I don't think anyone else would notice yet (but honestly, would they even say anything?  I suspect family would, but they haven't).  My body is just rearranging the weight it already carries, I guess.  I think I'm fixated because I expected to do nothing but gain weight for 9 months straight, so this has been a 19 week reprieve that I hadn't bothered to hope for.

The baby's heart is thump-thump-thumping away, based on my Friday appointment.  It seemed to be sitting in one place, this time, because the OB didn't have to move the Doppler around at all.  That's in stark contrast to my last appointment at 15 weeks, where the OB said we have a 'mover and a shaker" who wouldn't stay put for anything.  The 15 week appointment was in the morning (maybe 9:30am?) and Friday's appointment was at 3:15pm, so maybe we'll find that we have an afternoon napper on our hands.  Jesse will like that.